Writing your Internet SEX DATING profile

Your sex dating profile is incredibly important. It is the only way that other members will notice you. Take a little time to compose a short and simple message that will attract others.

Your profile photo
Your profile photo is the first thing a member sees and it's simply natural to want to put a face to a name. Put aside a few minutes to add a good, possibly sexy and seductive profile photo to grab some attention... and don't forget to smile.

Profile text
Write what comes naturally. Make it a simple introduction to who you are and what you are looking for.

Be honest, positive and maybe a little raunchy - it's early days, so you don't have to share everything at this stage - just provide what you are comfortable with to start that first conversation.

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Stay away from the following words in your sex dating profile

Loyal, trustworthy, caring and honest! Yes, the majority of us have these characteristics and it is obvious that we are all looking to find someone with these qualities. We have read these words too many times in profiles and I don’t think you are giving an honest description of who you really are. At no point would you meet a perfect stranger and introduce yourself by saying “Hi I’m a trustworthy, honest and loyal person”, so why include this in your profile as it doesn’t give the reader any real information about who you are? Tell people what you love about love, life and sex then invite them to join you in living it. Some things are important however, such as clean, discreet and non-smoking.

Tell members something different about yourself

Stand out from the crowd. You don’t want to write the same profile as everyone else, so be descriptive. You are unique and your profile should be too. If you have a hobby, interest or something you enjoy, include this in your profile. It’s a great conversation starter. If you love to travel, include the favourite places you’ve been too. If you have any particular sexual tastes, it is OK to mention these, as long as they are not too kinky or odd. This way you are letting members know some common-ground that you may share. If your love in life is sex outdoors, dogging, romantic evenings in, blue movies, threesomes or more, then you can be very sure that there are many others out there who will share your interests. If discretion is vitally important to you - tell other members how you feel. Remember, you are looking for someone who thinks as you do. Opposites do not always attract.

Keep your dating profile short and simple

It doesn’t need to be a novel. This should be a snippet of who you are so that they want to find out more from you. Don’t tell your entire life story in your profile, or there’s no reason for them to contact you.

Shorten your profile to a simple, chunky paragraph with enough information to spark their curiosity. Make sure that you come across as someone who is fun to be with. Use words like sexy, bubbly, lively, enthusiastic, romantic, affectionate, tactile and warm. Do not be too rude or imply that things will get physical immediately in the relationship. Let that develop naturally, as you would if you met someone at the bus stop.

Correct spelling is vital

Web sites don’t come with a built-in spell or grammar checker so write your profile in a word processor document first, checking the spelling and grammer carefully and then copy and paste this over. You wouldn’t send a CV to a potential employer with spelling mistakes so why upload a profile for a potential partner riddled with them? Something as simple as spelling could result in someone moving on to the next profile. If you can, get a friend to check it over and don't use abbreviations or slang like LOL and OMG. You are not a teenager! Write like a grown up.

Don't lie about anything in your profile

The truth always comes out at some point and no matter how small the lie may be, it could affect a future relationship. There is someone out there who is perfect for you, just the way you are. To describe yourself as 51 and slim, when you are really 67 and chubby is just asking for disappointment. Don't forget. We have thousands of members and there is definitely someone out there who is looking for someone just like you. Be yourself and be honest as people will admire this quality in you.

Remember, you can always edit your profile later

You can edit and update your profile as often as you want, so keep it fresh and up to date with what’s going on in your life. If you’re not too sure what to write about yourself, ask friends or family how they would describe you. Above all- have fun writing your profile. If you enjoy writing it then someone will enjoy reading it!

Your photograph

It is very important that you include a photograph in your profile. If you don't, people will wonder what you have to hide. Choose your photograph with care. We are all swayed by first impressions and someone famous (I forget who) once said "You never get a second chance to make a first impression". Please remember the following don'ts:

1. Don't include an ex partner in the photograph. Make sure that the picture is of you and you alone, preferably scrubbed up and looking smart. Wear smart clothes or sexy underwear, not your gardening coat. If you are a man DO NOT use a picture of your willy. This does not excite the average woman and just makes you look pervy. Don't crop the picture so that there is an arm around your shoulder either as this just gives the message "I have lost him/her". Be yourself, but be smiley, friendly and approachable.

2. Don't take a picture in the mirror. A blurry picture taken on your camera phone, using flash, will just put people off.

3. Don't include a favourite pet in the picture. You are selling yourself, not your animals. Mention your pet(s) in your written profile if they are important to you.

Do...

Do appear to be fun and happy. Do smile at the camera. Do be on your own in the picture. Be yourself, but be as warm and welcoming as possible. If you love holidays, use a picture taken while you are away, having fun. Please remember, you are selling yourself (not literally of course) so you need to appear as you want others to see you. If you do not have a suitable picture, get a friend to take one. It does not need to be taken by a professional though. A head and shouders picture outdoors will be fine, but make sure that you are genuinely smiling or even laughing. Nobody wants to meet a misery!

the next step...

The next step is to receive contact from another member. Even though you are chatting online, try to be on your best behaviour, just as you would on a first date. Please don't immediately launch into your strange sexual tastes or what turns you on. Your date will be with a person, not a prostitute. We all want to meet pleasant, well-balanced, gentle, likeable people, so make sure that you do not come over as a mad stalker or someone with very extreme views! Eventually, as you get to know someone, you can let your hair down and be yourself. Your sexual tastes, however odd, will often be encourtaged or at least tolerated once you have got to know someone well.

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